Roy Exum
On the front page of USA Today on Friday were 20 pictures of the actors the 87th Academy Awards committee has nominated for Oscars. Each person chosen this year happens to be white and the headline blared, “No Oscar for diversity.” It was so alarming that Rev. Al Sharpton called an emergency meeting of his “diversity task force” and, while the Academy’s president, Cheryl Isaac Burke (who is black), insisted there was no problem, the yelping of racial disparity immediately rang out across the country and that’s a real shame in this day and time.
Just because I was curious, I called up the 2014 All-American football team and, studying the first team players who represent the best in America, I found quite a disparity.
There are twice as many black players than there are white players on the Associated Press first team. Is that fair? Of the 24 first team selections, there are 14 blacks, seven whites, two American Samoans, and one Hispanic.
Knowing that the team is selected by a cross-section of the best sports writers and broadcasters in the country – and you have no idea what a lily-white bunch that is – it was refreshing to me that the world of sports came to the conclusion long ago that skin color has absolutely nothing to do with talent, skill or ability.
The 24 players who were picked on the first team of this year’s All-American team were chosen on only one criteria – they are the best at their position in the whole United States. Each most definitely earned that distinction. While it is hard to compare a wide receiver at Alabama with one from Utah State, the AP selection committee is so balanced it rarely makes a mistake. In short, each All-American has to earn the honor on the field of play and that’s what being named All-American is all about.
In my heart of hearts, I believe the 20 actors pictured on the front page of this nation’s largest newspaper have earned the right to be among the top five finalists in each category. This is the way the Academy voted. To replace any one of those properly chosen to meet some pseudo-racial quota would be preposterous and would be an affront to the Samuel Jacksons, the Morgan Freemans and the Denzel Washingtons who earned their Oscars long ago.
When 14 blacks, seven whites, two Samoans, and a Hispanic were named to the All-American football team, we applauded each and every one. There wasn’t a peep of protest one month ago. Why? They are each an American at his best. Let’s treat our best actors the same color-blind way.
Now that is off my chest, here are this week’s best two jokes for Saturday’s funnies:
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A guy who lives down the street from me, who is now 89 years young, was stopped by police around 2 a.m. and was asked where he was going at that time of night.
He told the officer, "I'm on my way to a lecture about alcohol abuse and the effects it has on the human body, as well as smoking and staying out late."
The officer asked, "Really? Who's giving that lecture at this time of night?"
The driver replied, "That would be my wife."
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Two women were walking through a park when they decided a refreshment would be nice but they both had their dogs on leashes. One had a handsome Doberman and the other her beloved Chihuahua . As they walked down the street, the one with the Doberman suggested, "Let's go over to that bar for a drink."
The lady with the Chihuahua said, "We can't go in there. We've got dogs with us."
The one with the Doberman said, "Just watch, and do as I do."
They walked over to the bar and the one with the Doberman put on a pair of dark glasses and started to walk in. The bouncer at the door said, "Sorry, lady, no pets allowed."
The woman with the Doberman said, "You don't understand. This is my seeing-eye dog."
The bouncer said, "A Doberman?"
The woman said, "Yes, they're using them now. They're very good," and the bouncer said, "OK, come on in," helping guide the lady to a table.
The lady with the Mexican hairless was betting it would be much harder to convince the bouncer that her Chihuahua was a seeing-eye dog, but decided to give it a try. She put on her dark glasses, shortened her dog’s leash, and started to walk in.
Once again the bouncer said, "Sorry, ma’am, no pets allowed."
The woman said, "You don't understand. This is my seeing-eye dog"
The bouncer said, "A Chihuahua?"
The woman paused a couple of long seconds and then screamed, “A Chihuahua? Are you kidding me! They actually gave me a Chihuahua!?!”
The bouncer seated the distraught woman immediately.
royexum@aol.com